When Your Priorities Start Competing

Every August, I start hearing the same questions.

"What time should bedtime be?"

"Will my child know anyone in their class?"

"Should we practice tying shoes? Packing a backpack? Solving quadratic equations?"

Back-to-school brings a lot of logistics, but I don't think that's what makes August feel so overwhelming.

I think it's friction. I talked about this briefly last week and want us to keep thinking about it. Next week I'll touch on friction at work.

Summer isn't quite over, but work is ramping up. The kids still want one more adventure, but the budget is tighter. Bedtimes need to move earlier just as everyone's gotten comfortable staying up late. Calendars begin to fill before we really know what the school year will look like.

Our priorities start competing.

And when our priorities compete it’s pretty normal for resilience to drop.

Here's the thing: competing priorities aren't a sign you're doing something wrong. They're actually a sign of a full life. You care about your family, your work, your health, your friendships, your community. Those multiple roles make us more resilient over time because no single part of our identity has to carry the entire weight of who we are.

The problem isn't having competing priorities.

The problem is trying to treat all of them as equally urgent.

When you start feeling that August friction, resist the urge to simply push harder.

Instead, pause and ask yourself: What are my priorities right now?

Not forever. Not this year. Right now.

And then ask: Which actions actually align with those priorities?

Resilience isn't about doing everything.

It's about making intentional choices when everything seems important.

As your family heads into a new school year, or as you settle into a new season at work or at home, I hope you'll give yourself permission to reassess instead of react.

Sometimes the friction isn't telling you to work harder. Sometimes it's reminding you to realign.

All my best,

Dr. G